Monday, April 14, 2008
J vs.The Cheese Danish
[J enters office kitchen]
Cheese Danish: Heyyyyy!!! There's my boy! How ya doin'?
J Money: Leave me alone, Cheese Danish. You're not winning today. I just got up here from the gym.
CD: Sure, sure... I understand. Good for you, buddy.
JM: Don't mess with me today, Cheese Danish. I know your tricks.
CD: No, no tricks... Getting some coffee, I see... mmm, you know what goes good with coffee? Me.
JM: Dammit, I knew it. Leave me alone, Cheese Danish!
CD: Ohhh, but we were meant to be together. You and me, fat guy and cheese danish.
JM: Screw you. [pause] You do look delicious, though.
CD: Oh, yeah... and I'm only 70 cents. And I bet the Combos in here that I would get selected first. Come on, buddy... help me out.
JM: You guys bet on who gets eaten first?
CD: Yeah, to pass the time on weekends.
JM: Do you ever bet against the gum?
CD: The gum? Seriously, have you ever seen someone buy chewing gum out of a vending machine like this? Use your f-cking head, J.
JM: Hey, take it easy, you congealed, month-old pastry.
CD: I know, I know... I get a little wound up sometimes... but look at me... I'm deliciously naughty. Just look... come onnnnn... loooook over heeeerre.
JM: I know... the combination of sticky, who-knows-how-old cheese that's been under a light in a dusty vending machine for several weeks is somehow strangely allurring to me... and I just cannot ever figure out why. But no! I went to the gym! The few calories I actually burned will be used up by half of you!
CD: But think how happy you will be as you eat me... you know you want to... fatty.
JM: Grrr. Screw you. I'm getting my coffee and leaving.
CD: No! Wait! Come back! Noooooooooooooo! I miss you! We belong together!
[J leaves room]
CD: Arrrrgh...
CD: Hey, Snickers Bar, you feeling lucky? 2-to-1 I go before breakfast tomorrow.
Cheese Danish: Heyyyyy!!! There's my boy! How ya doin'?
J Money: Leave me alone, Cheese Danish. You're not winning today. I just got up here from the gym.
CD: Sure, sure... I understand. Good for you, buddy.
JM: Don't mess with me today, Cheese Danish. I know your tricks.
CD: No, no tricks... Getting some coffee, I see... mmm, you know what goes good with coffee? Me.
JM: Dammit, I knew it. Leave me alone, Cheese Danish!
CD: Ohhh, but we were meant to be together. You and me, fat guy and cheese danish.
JM: Screw you. [pause] You do look delicious, though.
CD: Oh, yeah... and I'm only 70 cents. And I bet the Combos in here that I would get selected first. Come on, buddy... help me out.
JM: You guys bet on who gets eaten first?
CD: Yeah, to pass the time on weekends.
JM: Do you ever bet against the gum?
CD: The gum? Seriously, have you ever seen someone buy chewing gum out of a vending machine like this? Use your f-cking head, J.
JM: Hey, take it easy, you congealed, month-old pastry.
CD: I know, I know... I get a little wound up sometimes... but look at me... I'm deliciously naughty. Just look... come onnnnn... loooook over heeeerre.
JM: I know... the combination of sticky, who-knows-how-old cheese that's been under a light in a dusty vending machine for several weeks is somehow strangely allurring to me... and I just cannot ever figure out why. But no! I went to the gym! The few calories I actually burned will be used up by half of you!CD: But think how happy you will be as you eat me... you know you want to... fatty.
JM: Grrr. Screw you. I'm getting my coffee and leaving.
CD: No! Wait! Come back! Noooooooooooooo! I miss you! We belong together!
[J leaves room]
CD: Arrrrgh...
CD: Hey, Snickers Bar, you feeling lucky? 2-to-1 I go before breakfast tomorrow.
Labels: fatness
