Thursday, January 31, 2008

Oh, Lost, How I Detest Thee

Those who know me are aware of how much I hate the abomination of a television show known as Lost.

And it's back tonight on ABC. And my dilemma is that I loathe Lost but I love my wife. And she sort of kind of likes this show. She doesn't get it, either, mainly because it's f-cking stupid and nobody gets it... not even the loyalists.

She even admits it's ridiculous and all over the place and it's impossible to really know what's going on.

However, with this writers' strike, it's about all we've got. I've heard that ABC didn't get the whole season done and only has like 8 or 10 episodes in the can and didn't really want to put it on without being able to finish the season... but then they must have realized, "Screw it, nobody ever really gets pissed no matter what the hell garbage we do with this show. Run it!"

And so it's back tonight. And my lovely wife has a class at her gym tonight so I have to actually, willingly, consciously choose to DVR this terrible, terrible, horseshit television show.

Hey, guess what! I bet there are a bunch of unexplained mysteries! And "backstories"! Ooooh, how exciting! I just can't wait to find out what happened to Jack three years ago that makes him such a handsomely brooding young man!

Blech.

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Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Travis

This is Travis. No, we don't own him. Let's just get that out of the way first.

You may or may not know that my darling Watersyne and I have been planning to get a doggie for a while now. We were married last year and our lives were a whirlwind and we knew that between our lives and our teeny-tiny house it just didn't make sense to have a dog yet. But when we got to Texas, oh, then that would be the time.

I suspect getting a dog is a little like getting pregnant in the sense that you're never perfectly ready for it so you might as well just pick a time and do it. There will always be reasons not to so just stop looking for them. So we agreed when we got here that we wanted to get serious about it. (Puppies, not babies. At least not yet.)

We had pretty much settled on the breed we want, too. My parents have two dogs, an Irish Setter and a King Charles Cavalier Spaniel. The Cavalier is a wonderful dog, smallish in size, with a terrific temperment and personality. However, they -- like so many dogs -- are hairy and shed a lot. Watersyne does not like shedding. It messes with her neat and orderly new house. You understand. (What she will do if our child has hair, I don't know.)

So the conventional wisdom is to get a poodle or something mixed with a poodle so that you get the hypoallergenic beneifts of poodles. That is, non-shedding, in most cases.

So the next question is, do they mix Cavaliers and Poodles? And they do. They're known as Cavapoos. Travis is a Cavapoo. And he was at a breeder in, of all places, Texas. I found this breeder online back in November and sent Watersyne Travis' picture and she fell in love. In fact, Travis has been her wallpaper ever since.

Obviously, we realized we wouldn't be getting Travis since we weren't going to get a pup until we got here. So when we got down here right before the New Year, I contacted the breeder and told them our story.

They were responsive and answered our questions and asked me to fill out a puppy application. They were located about 200 miles away but I knew we'd make that trek on a weekend to check the selection out and ensure we weren't dealing with a puppy mill.

So we tried to arrange a time to visit them the first weekend of January -- 1/5 or 1/6. And we heard nothing back. So I called the owner of the place (I had been dealing with her assistant via email) on Sat, 1/5. We had a lovely talk and she told us she has Lupis and her husband travels a lot so they're a little wary about people coming to their home.... but that she understands people's fears about puppy mills and she of course wants adopters to meet the pups and the mother, etc. So she said she'd check into her availability the next day and call us back.

Later that night, I get an email from her assistant that Sunday 1/6 won't work but how about the following weekend? I say, uh, sure, Sunday 1/13 works for us.

I try to follow up later in the week and get no answers. I leave messages Friday and two on Saturday, 1/12, trying to not only confirm plans, but also learn where I'm going. No response.

I get an email finally on Monday apologizing and telling me they had a new litter of puppies on Friday and that caused chaos and that's why they didn't get back to me but that they'd like to reschedule for the following weekend. I replied and said I could understand that, but that the professional thing would be to pick up the phone for 3 minutes and explain. Or answer one of my calls. Or email before the weekend was over. This was now going to be three straight weekends we were going to be making ourselves available without success. Kind of irritating.

I got no response to my email. So Watersyne gave a call and left a message. No response.

So we're more than a little pissed off. I'm withholding the name of this place -- temporarily -- just in case we can get something worked out. But if we don't, I'll be bashing them here so that perhaps Googlers will find out the truth about them. My only hesitation is that no matter how hard I search, I find nothing bad about them. They seem to be the go-to source for Cavapoos. Weird.

So Travis -- the idea of Travis -- remains in flux. We could always visit local shelters and give one of those deserving pups a good home... but I also don't feel bad about getting the breed we know we want. They're supposed to be great personalities, good with kids, easy to train, etc. So we'll see how it goes. There's another breeder outside of Houston, but she breeds Cavaliers to Havanese. We might go see her and maybe we'll fall in love with one of them.

To be continued, I am sure.

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Monday, January 28, 2008

Big-Ass TVs

So despite all the bitching for not posting, I get a lot of content up there and I get one positive comment from NicHul (thanks!) and one about my wife's ass (nice!) ... and that's it? All that work? What do you think I do this for your entertainment? Or maybe that's all that's reading. Probably, actually. Maybe I should start letting more people know it exists. And then get fired.

Last week, I finally went to buy our new TV for the Texas house (yes, since I still own the NJ house I have to specify -- you'll understand when you're a high-rolling, multi-homeowner like we are) because, well, it's time. We were still watching the 32-incher that was in the living room of the dollhouse we lived in up in NJ and it was just silly. The 32 looked ludicrously small in our big living room here. In fact, my mom came to visit for the weekend and when she came in and saw it, she couldn't believe it was the same TV from home. And we found ourselves laughing at how silly it looked. So there you go, it was time.

So I went to this Houston-area electronics place called Conn's (heh, insert own joke here) because we'd heard their prices were unbeatable and we keep getting flyers from them in the Sunday paper. And, well, their deals are hard to believe. And I don't think this stuff fell off a truck because, you know, this isn't Jersey.

I went in there saying I wanted between 46 and 52 for our living room and I preferred LCD or DLP -- not plasma. Sorry, plasma loyalists, but when your TV burns out in five years, I'll be laughing at your asses.

I ended up settling on a 46-inch Sharp Aquos, which is just a terrific television. Of course, once you're in the giant store and you see 58, 61, 65, 70 and 73-inch TVs, you begin to second-guess yourself and think that maybe 46 isn't big enough.

Oh, it's big enough. I can't even imagine what those other sizes would look like in our house, but I do plan to find out. The 61 and 65 inch DLPs were actually less money than the 46-inch LCD Aquos, but there are all sorts of legit reasons for that (LCD costs more, better viewing angles, more features, etc.). I can't tell you how close I came to getting both the 46 and a 65 incher for our upstairs bonus room. But then I wasn't sure I wanted to come home and explain that decision to Watersyne. She's very understanding -- and she, too, wants a big TV upstairs -- but even so, we had agreed to do one at a time and if I came home with an order sheet for two deliveries, I probably wouldn't be allowed to go out and shop alone anymore for these kinds of things.

Anyway, so I resisted the huge temptation and got just the 46. And it looks amazing in the living room. And so now, the downstairs living room is only missing an end table and a coffee table and once that's done, it'll be pretty much completely set. The bedroom furniture is finally being delivered today and so the downstairs is coming together nicely. The guest rooms upstairs are even done (minus wall-hangings, but that's true everywhere in the house) so the next steps are making the garage have space for our cars and then, on to the bonus room/media room.

Sweet.

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Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Catcher of Flak

So I recently have been catching some flak for not updating this site enough. And yes, I know, I know, I've fallen into the bad habit of never updating. And boo hoo for you. But to be fair, I do spend my creative energy when not doing my new job or unpacking or performing various other marital obligations (wink wink) updating another site, Boiled Sports. However, that's just me (and two other dudes) spouting sports opinions. And I know those who come here do so to read up on my life. Because it's just soooooo interesting.

And the funny thing is, I was emailing with NicHul, one of my few loyal readers recently, and I realized that she doesn't know much about what's been going on because I haven't posted much. And Xtrosity is in the same boat. Me not posting means my friends actually have to talk to me and, honestly, who wants to do that?

So, you'll see below that if you haven't visited recently, there's a lot of new material up. The truth is, I file stuff away and begin many posts and just never get them out of draft mode. So I finished a few and pledge to you to continue to do so. You'll get some time from me several times a week going forward. In fact, I'm even thinking of making February my post-a-day month. I've been wanting to do this for a while -- years now, even -- where I just pick a month and make sure I post every single day, mainly just to see if I can do it. And February is usually the month I want to do because it's the shortest month on the calendar.

The problem is, my life isn't interesting enough to write about every single damn day. But still, I've got things to ramble about and stories to tell and so I think I'm going to do it. And then you'll see just how boring this thing can get. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Of course, the other thing to realize is that those few who do read this are simply doing so to pass time at work and when that's why you're surfing the Internet, a good test pattern will entertain you. So maybe my drivel can pass for a test pattern. We'll see, I guess.

I'm back, bitches.

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Monday, January 14, 2008

Goodbye, Prince of Darkness Car

That's what one of my friends in New York called my car. It was a 2003 Nissan Altima 3.5 SE, in "Super Black, with tinted black windows and nice rims and I just loved it. It had the 245 HP engine and could do 0-60 in 5.9 seconds, so it was what I love -- a sneaky-fast car. It's basically a souped up family sedan that could hang with most sports cars. So much fun. My car has been mine for five years as of January 11 and 113,200 happy miles. And she decided on the way down to Texas that, apparently, she's had enough of my abuse.

On the way down here to Tejas, the Altima's "Service engine soon" light came on for perhaps the 6th or 7th time in the past 14 months (all beginning in Oct '06 on my way to Xtrosity's wedding -- thanks a lot, X). A couple times they've claimed it was a code that said the gas cap wasn't tightened but more often than not it's been a warning that my car is quite low on oil... like several quarts low. And each time, the service people at Nissan come out and give me their best, condescending, are-you-a-chick-or-something voice and say, "Son, when was the last time you changed the oil?" Like, you know, I was going to go, "Ga-ga-ga-zoinks! Oil? Change? Wha?"

This particular instance, it was less than two weeks earlier when I put $1100 into it to make it road-worthy for the journey down here and, hopefully, to last me my first year or so here. Oh, and in addition to the light being on, my left headlight would go out intermittenly... A good whack on the side of the headlight always brought it back, but I figured they could change the bulb for me since it was clearly failing. This, of course, began literally the night before we were to leave NJ for Texas.

So let's start there. I ask them to check the headlight and replace the bulb. No, it's not just the bulb. It's the whole assembly because of a "bad ground." Okay, so more money, but not tons, right? Well, sure, except to change the Altima's headlight assembly, one has to remove the frickin' BUMPER first. And in the end, you're talking $300-$400 in labor to change out the headlight. So they advised me to bang on it to get it to work until it doesn't work anymore. Solid. Solid solution.

Then the oil issue... well, since there was no oil leakage anywhere visible -- not on my driveway, not all over the engine, etc... they didn't know what that meant. Other than that there was no doubt something faulty within my engine. And I said, well, what do we do? And she tells me that to diagnose it, they'd have to begin taking the engine apart and the labor involved could well reach into the thousands by the time they figure things out. So just check the oil every week and add some. OUTstanding. Just the answer I wanted.

So then I asked if they ncould do my Texas inspection...because here in Texas, you can't even get a license until your cars are inspected and registered and tagged. Weird. But whatever. So she says yes, it's $39 at Nissan. Perfect.

Wait, not perfect. She comes back out with MORE bad news. My engine computer is still wigging out and the car won't pass Texas emissions. So she suggests I drive it for 60+ miles to "reset the computer" and then come back. Okay. I drive it about 200 miles and come back in later in the week. They hook it up again; it fails again. She comes out and shrugs and says they don't know what else to do. Seriously. Don't know what else to do. Because they don't recommend the thousands of dollars option on a car with 113,000+ miles. Outstanding. So how do I register my five year old car here in Texas? Especially considering all the jalopies I see driving around without engine computers fouling up things. She thinks for a while and then says she'll "call some people" and then call my cell. She hasn't called yet and I don't expect her to.

So I begin deliberating. I have a car that won't pass Texas emissions and clearly has some kind of significant internal problems. And a $400 headlight issue. But for now the service engine soon light is off. And it's still running as good as the day I got it. I'd just keep driving it, except that I know it's eventually going to be a huge headache and, you know, I can't register it here. And that's sort of an issue since my NJ registration, of course, expires at the end of January and the inspection expired last month.

So I go to Carmax to see what they will do. They do a full inspection/appraisal and offer me $5500 on the spot for it, which is less than Kelly Blue Book says it's worth... but then again, I imagine KBB assumes a car without serious problems about to occur. So I left and continued deliberating, since my offer from them was good for one week. After thinking some more and discussing with the wife, I then just bit the bullet and went back on Saturday and took their offer and applied the cash to a new used car.

I'm now the owner of a 2003 Acura 3.2 TL Type S. Sure, it's the same year as the Altima I traded in, but this car has only 49K miles on it and it's basically a Honda, as far as reliability. Or so I hope. It is silver with black leather... and it's the Type S. For those wondering, it's the last year of the previous body style. Basically, it looks just like this (color and all).

I really wanted the Type S since that was a more exclusive version of that car... and it's 260 HP instead of the standard '03 TL's 225 HP. And we all know how I like speed and power. And plus it's a step up from the 245 my Altima had... obviously we can't downgrade.

Parting with the Altima after all those many happy miles was definitely not easy. I was a little sad as we cleaned her out and walked away for the last time. I never stopped loving that car and enjoyed driving it every single day. It was fast, sleek, and never looked out-of-style at all, something I think Nissan does very well -- none of their old cars look truly old and clunky. You see a ten year old Maxima and it still looks nice.

But alas, it was time to part ways. 113K was a good amount of time together, especially for someone like me who gets a craving for a new car every few weeks. I took delivery of the Altima on January 11, 2003 and I sold her on January 12, 2008. 1,827 days. And on the way down here, we passed her likely birthplace in Mississippi. Kind of neat.

So off we go with the new vehicle. We'll see how this partnership goes.

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Tuesday, January 01, 2008

On The Road Again, Part III

We stopped for the night on Friday night, 12/28, in some podunk location known as McComb, Mississippi. We stopped because there were hotels. Basically, between Memphis and McComb, we hadn't had to slow down. I'm not even kidding. Mississippi is another of those states where you just set the cruise control and lock in. Interstate 55 just runs straight for a couple hundred miles with the only variation being slight uphills and downhills.

We passed through the capital of Mississippi and the only "major" city they have, Jackson, and there's honestly nothing there. I was kind of shocked. I mean, I know it's the South and I know their cities aren't what we're used to in the North but, come on... there was nothing there. Basically, it was like passing through one of those areas on an Interstate in the middle of nowhere where a bunch of chain restaurants and hotels spring up and there are all those mile-high signs that look like trash. So I guess that's all there is in Jackson. Chain restaurants and hotels. It's basically a glorified truck stop. How depressing. And to think, the kids who grew up in McComb think that's the "big city."

So we got up on Saturday morning, 12/29 and away we went. We were both craving a Waffle House, which are prevalent in the South, so that's what we began looking for. The nearest one was twenty miles but it was in the direction we were heading... which is to say, even further South.

We found the Waffle House and Watersyne felt like she should turn her diamonds around to the inside of her hand because she was truly afraid. And she probably is the wise one between the two of us because I'm kind of oblivious and just sit down and enjoy myself wherever we are. I like to pretend I blend in with the people but I'm not sure we really blended well with our tinted out, NJ-plated car in a random burg in Louisiana.

Ah, yes, Louisiana. One of the more interesting places to drive. We got about as far South as the Interstate would take us without running us into New Orleans and then we turned Westbound on I-10. I-10 takes you all the way across the country to Los Angeles, I believe. And, well, building the interstate there in southern Louisiana was clearly a trick. See, it's as much of a swamp as you've heard and a lot of areas are simply names "Something something" swamp. Like "Jackson Swamp" or something like that. Only most of the names are creole/French-sounding and it looks like the kind of place you'd catch malaria if you ventured outside your car. And then, before you know it, the interstate becomes an elevated highway. Have you ever seen the seven mile bridge to the Florida keys? Well, that's sort of what it reminded me of. The highway is literally just on stilts about 40 feet above swampwaters. It's kind of gross and eerie. I mean, a bad wreck and you're off the side... fortunately not a long fall, but you land in muck that probably would suck you down. And God KNOWS what lives in that shit. Good lord. And that's the way back to New Orleans so whenever we do that road trip, we'll get to see it again. I can only imagine how lovely that muck is in the summertime heat.

After a while more in Louisiana, we finally hit the Texas border. And you get a grip on how large Texas is when you see the first mileage sign that says, "EL PASO 880." 880 freakin' miles to El Paso. Want perspective? You can drive from New York to Chicago... in less!

So we pulled into the immediate welcome center and took some goofy pics in front of the "Welcome to Texas" sign and met other people doing the same thing. The welcome center was actually one of the nicest ones I've ever seen. And then it was back into the car for the final haul down to H-town.

We finally rolled into town at about 5:30 that evening and our journey was over. And as much as I like road trips, I'm not sure if going that far is worth it unless you're moving like we were. I kept thinking that if we came home for a longer period sometime -- like two weeks or more -- that I'd drive it so we would have a car there and could bring whatever we want, etc. But 1,800 miles is a long-ass haul. We'll see what happens.

So we're back, and we're getting settled into our beautiful house that we love. Stay tuned for more "Tales from Texas." And in the meantime, enjoy our picture show below.

Don't tell Pennsylvanians... but we're all independent. And how perfect is it that there's a pickup truck in this shot? Too bad it's not also in the left lane doing 50 MPH.


If you can't read it, the West Virginia welcome sign says, "Open for business." Well, good to know. I guess they're really eager for everyone to know they're not closed, so come on in! I can just imagine how this came about: "Wait, why is everyone leaving? Wait, come back! Hey.. hey! Hey! We're open for business, I tell you! Wait, I've got it! Put that on the welcome sign and watch 'em flow right in!"


Maryland keeps it simple. "Enjoy your visit." Okie dokie. As long as your troopers don't stop me, I'll have enjoyed my visit. Now go away.


"Virginia welcomes you." Really? That's kind of broad, isn't it? What if I'm a complete prick who plans to commit crimes in your state? Does Virginia still welcome me? Speaking of which, Virginia is one of two places in the U.S. where radar detectors are illegal. Thus, I do not welcome Virginia.


Tennessee welcomed us, too. And they're the volunteer state. I don't have any jokes to make here.

Mississippi: "It's like coming home." Um, if you live there, I guess. And, you know, haven't realized you're allowed to leave yet.


This was the cool "Welcome to Louisiana" sign but we couldn't get a clear shot. The fact that I was doing 85 MPH probably didn't aid in the photography. But trust me, it was cool. And it had the welcome message in French right underneath it which is kind of neat. Not that I want French influence in our country, but the fact that there is still a gutteral form of French spoken in Louisiana is kind of quaint.


We took this one at the welcome center so we had one in focus. It'll do.


We've made it! The Welcome to Texas sign says "Drive friendly - the Texas way." On the back it says, "...or we'll shoot you dead."


Home sweet home.

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